How to have Sex in a Movie Theater without Getting Caught

Yes, you can. Although there are now infrared cameras to prevent this from happening, follow our tips and you won’t be caught. *Winks*

This seated theater seating arrangement can be pretty distracting. Check these things before you get yourself in: if the seats have armrests and are stadium-style, and the row in front of your seats isn’t too far away from yours. If you’re tall enough, have some good hand-eye coordination, some good balance, strong legs, are not all that short, strong legs, and have a partner who’s willing to make this work, then you’ll want to try this maneuver.

The best way to avoid wardrobe malfunctions at such a thing is to wear a skirt with no panties, a mini skirt with a g string or thong on underneath.

  • Now, stand in front of your partner
  • Place your legs on top of the armrests on each side of your partner’s arms and then hold yourself up with your arms with the seats directly in front of the both of you.
  • Put your underwear to the side, or completely remove them, while he or she moves in and gives you some oral sex.
  • If you’re able to hold yourself long enough without grunting or moaning loudly, and he or she is able to, then they should be able to give you an orgasm depending on their technique.

A willing partner goes a long way in making this work. They can hold up your hips by holding your ass up, and for some additional stability, they can have their elbows laying on top of their legs.

if they themselves have enough upper body strength, they can hold you up with one hand, while they finger bangs you with the other, alongside the oral sex.

You’ll have to find a time in the afternoon when no one else is going to be there and wait until like half way through the movie before having sex so that no one will walk in on you.

OR

  • Back row. Him – sweats. You – skirt.
  • Pick a film no one wants to see. Foreign film matinees are perfect.

And, for those who want to try these or any sexual act in any public place, please please please:

** For the love of common human decency, please don’t leave a mess. There are garbage cans in the back. :<CLEAN UP THE MESS IF YOU LEAVE ANY, THERE ARE CHILDREN AND OTHER PEOPLE THAT HAVE TO USE THAT SPOT LATER IN THE FUTURE**

I hope that helps.

You’ll have to find a time in the afternoon when no one else is going to be there and wait until like halfway through the movie before having sex so that no one will walk in on you.

My Work Advise as a Projectionist

As someone who works at a movie theater, I’ve caught people breaking the movie theater rules (including eating, taking drugs, and fighting) in several acts. Keep in mind that managers are watching what everyone is doing throughout the whole film from a manager in the room above you in most cases. They usually don’t look through any windows and they aren’t walking around in the theater during the film but they do have a line of sight to all of you.

If you have an idea to get things done at 1 in the morning, this is probably your best option. The projection manager leaves when the last movie ends and they don’t come in to clean up afterward.

But

If you’re the last movie to get out, then count on someone to walk in soon after to confirm that nobody’s there. Someone has to walk in and check if nobody is in the theaters before we can lock them.

Sometimes theater checks CAN take place during the movie. Although, most of the time they do not. (It can happen up to half an hour in either direction).

So, go during the week for a movie that’s been out for a while, and you’ll almost certainly be the only person in the theater.

We love that you have fun while doing this, and we’re committed to making sure you’re safe at all times. Just take care when preparing your post, because if it is caught, we don’t care, and probably would just ask you to stop.

But that’s not all…

I have been a projectionist in theaters, so I have some insight as to how this situation goes.

If what you translate as “fuck” or “sex” means fingering your partner or getting a hand job, it’s really not all that hard and you are GUARANTEED to almost never, ever get caught.

You only need to put your coats over your laps and she snuggles up to you and the rest is history. If it’s an uncrowded theater then you could get a blow job but speaking as a former projectionist, we can see you getting head from our perch. I never did anything about it – who wants to be a killjoy?

But if you really want to get the “mile high club,” consider getting a movie ticket on Tuesday night when the theater is mostly empty and take your seat. Head down a few rows (so the projectionist cannot see you) then find the perfect spot – move to the very last row when the lights go down – the projectionist cannot see the last five rows. In general, these seats will be darker since they are farther away from the light source, so there’s not a single risk of getting caught!

One of the drawbacks of sitting in the last row is that this is where rowdy people like to sit, too. This can sometimes be difficult for regulars who are there every night and might start trouble. Other than that, you’ll get lucky and there will be no one in your row so you can focus on what really matters – your girlfriend coming up from your lap with a grin on her face but it is often a frantic and desperate exercise that you’re trying to complete as quickly as possible.

If the movie is really good, that’s a serious problem. I had to watch “Cloverfield” all over again, but I kind of got the gist the first time and the movie just didn’t work for me. “The Sixth Sense” was totally blown (pun intended) when it first came out.

While “Cinema Paradiso” was my favorite movie, I have never seen people in full sex mode like they are depicted in the film. What concerns me is the guy on the end of the row getting up to get popcorn and all of those who are watching voyeuristically with nothing to get up for or who want to participate.

ALSO SEE: Can You Conceal Carry in a Movie Theater?

Extra tips on How to Pull Off Your Cinema Sex Fantasy

  • Tips 1

The best time to fuck in the projectionist booth is during the previews! Just after the theater goes dark, you drop to your knees and have his big white dong disappear inside you.

  • Tip: 2

Before you arrange for a movie theatre, it’s important to think about where you want to go. First, choose a theater that is not too crowded. Second, select a blockbuster film that has already flopped. Third, go when the movie starts and select a seat in the last row of the theater. Finally, just wear what you can comfortably do without removing your clothing in public – for a girl wear a dress which is not required to remove, and don’t wear a bra and panty or remove it before entering the movie hall.. My personal favorite when going to the movies.

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